I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize