i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
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