Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Randomize