Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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