If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
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