im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize