Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize