when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
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