ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
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My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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