i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
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Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
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