Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
It's not a walk of shame if you run
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize