You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
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