I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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