The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
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