Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
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I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
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puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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