If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
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