if only i could text you this smell
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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