What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Let's paint friendship bongs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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