Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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