we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Randomize