you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
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I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
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Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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