Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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