he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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