i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
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