Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize