if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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