**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
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