haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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