turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They took my balls.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I'm way too hungover for life right now
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize