wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize