i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize