Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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