Already got asked if we're dating
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Randomize