I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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