The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
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