I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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