so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize