anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
If I had your ass I would rule the world
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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