she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Banned from zoo.
Again?
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Randomize