Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize