I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize