sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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