You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I hate all girls vehemently.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
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