Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize