the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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