Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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