You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
did i just pee glitter
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize