whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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