so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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