whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
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Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize